Faith Passed Down, Faith Made Personal

I was born in a Christian family and my grandma is a faithful Christian. She likes reading the Bible in the afternoon, even though she only has a primary school education. Every afternoon, she would sit by the window with her reading glasses perched on her nose, and her Bible open on her lap. Through the crack in the door, I could see her sitting there quietly, the sun shining on her and the book. In those moments, I often wondered why she chose to spend her free time reading such a complex and seemingly “boring” book instead of watching TV like others her age. Sometimes I couldn’t help asking her why, but she would just smile and tell me that God is our good father and we should read his words through the Bible.

At that age, I couldn’t understand what this meant to me, but seeds of faith were planted in my heart though I didn’t know it yet. She also likes singing worship songs throughout the day. Her soft humming always filled the room as I played nearby, and I found myself humming along to worship songs I didn’t fully understand. To me, God felt more like my family’s God than my own, and praying and trusting him seemed enough. Thus, I would pray with my grandma at night, kneeling beside her by the bed. Whenever I traveled somewhere or faced important milestones, like my college entrance exam, I always prayed with her. But I rarely went to church and read the Bible.

Until I went to university, I thought I was not a bad Christian because I believed in God and prayed often. However, that all began to change when I arrived in the UK for my undergraduate studies. Here, for the first time, I began seriously studying the Bible and regularly attending church services. To be honest, the first time I joined a Bible study, I found it overwhelming. The discussions about grace, sin, and salvation seemed too deep and boring for me and felt more like an assignment than a fellowship. Hearing that I was a “sinner” felt particularly harsh—it clashed with my self-perception as a decent person who followed the rules. Since I didn’t feel like a sinner, I didn’t need his salvation, and the gospel to me felt more like God was not as loving as he says he is. So every time I saw others deeply repenting for their sins, I felt like an outsider, not moved at all, but only confused. What kept me attending was that I felt that God always teaches us to build good character, which was what I desired—to be a better person.

An outreach activity I participated in during the summer vacation of my second year changed my mind. In fact, I decided to participate in this event at first mainly to practice my English. But there, I witnessed God’s work—how faithful other Christians were and how enthusiastically and joyfully they participated in many activities like communicating with non-Christians and sharing the gospel. They always had the power and courage to do whatever they needed to do and gave glory to God. At that moment, I understood that it was God who brought us together as a group of people to do the same thing, even though we came from different backgrounds, countries, and cultures.

One experience helped me realize how much I need God. During the outreach, I had to cycle every day to do these activities, but I was completely unfamiliar with it. Filled with fear and anxiety, I found for the first time that I could not do anything but pray. It was in such a situation that whenever I cycled, I prayed silently in my heart, and my relationship with God unknowingly became closer. After returning home, I began to reflect on what I had learned and gained. Unexpectedly, I had the idea of ​​being baptized, and I was confident that he was the one I wanted to commit my life to. Additionally, as I studied the Bible more and more, I slowly realized that sin was more than just breaking the rules. As the Apostle Paul said, “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate” (Romans 7:15). Almost every day, I had this struggle in studies and relationships. In truth, I was a complete sinner. With this conviction, I was baptized last year. I remembered that day, as I stood in the water, I knew I was a new creation, surrendering my life to him completely.

Now, I just graduated and am volunteering with COCM, a Christian organization in the UK. Looking back, I never thought one day I would walk on this path and I would have refused to do so in the past because I had my own ambitions. But God has transformed my perspective, opening my eyes to see that He is above all things. Serving with COCM has shown me that his plans are always greater than my own. All I can do is receive them humbly and gratefully. Looking ahead, although I still don’t know my next step, I trust in the promise of Romans 8:28, knowing that he is using my life for his purpose.

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